psychotic turnbuckles

_{The Barman on tour in Japan at Mr Death's Crampstore with The Grand Wizard of the Psychotic Turnbuckles.}  

Top Ten Albums and Other Things In No Particular Order (with a qualifier that I never review gigs promted by the Bar but, fuck that, it’s my Top Ten.)

Ten Albums
1. Dark Country – Sonic Garage (self released)
This turned up on the eve of an overseas trip so a full review from yours truly isn’t among the glowing tributes already posted. A step up on the debut (which was pretty good in its own right) with lots of weaving guitars and classy keyboard textures. Sydney Old Man Rock and Roll. Just buy it.

2. Hackney Diamonds – The Rolling Stones (Rolling Stones Records)
You might have wanted to hate it. Lead “single” “Angry” was so-so but turned out to be one of the parts of a sum that’s much better than it could have been. There's a formula here but it's not a negative when it's in the hands of its inventors. Trust your own ears: It sounds contemporary but this is still The Stones being the Stones, even without Charlie.

Every year The Barman makes the call-out for the Top Ten. Every year I can’t reduce mine to only ten.  Near impossible. I have cheated and there way too many highlights. For me personally, it was good to step out and do an acoustic gig for the opening might of Bryan Cooke’s musical photography exhibition in Sydney.  I used to play these shows at The Excelsior, Hopetoun and Manly Fishos and aim to do more this year.

Live Gigs

1. Grace Cummings in several places
It has  been a long time I have seen one artist or band four times in a year. I was envious of other people as Grace’s local performances, up until recently, have very rare. In fact, it’s been almost 18 months between Sydney shows. Notably, one was a warm-up prior to a gruelling American and European tour that included a live performance on the Steven Colbert late show.  

Four months later came an actual album launch for “Romana” at Sydney’s Metro Social in August. Then I won a lottery for a spot at the Phoenix Theatre, and finally caught a packed Crowbar show in early December.

In no particular order and with the caveat that there are notable omissions because I haven’t heard the Chimers album yet and have only seen parts of the Hard-Ons documentary.  Yes, it’s more than 10 but I plead undiagnosed dyscalculia (i.e. I can’t count). As for the rule of not reviewing I-94 Bar label releases or shows, it's being bent. Slightly. 

The Dictators – The Dictators
It’s hard to come to grips with a Manitoba-less line-up and many of Andy's songs are re-heated versions of old material. Judged on its merits as the work of a new line-up, however, “The Dictators” is a credible comeback album that holds up to repeated listens. We need Ross The Boss' guitar roar and Andy's lyrical smart-arsery now more than ever.

In The Zone – Mick Medew and Ursula
Yes, it’s on the house label and Mine Host generally doesn’t review I-94 Bar shows or releases, but others have.  Great enough to earn Mick and Ursula the Keys to Brisbane City and have digi-single “Punk Grandma” finish Number-Three in the 4ZZZ Hot 100. All hail The Zeds (and 2RRR and 2XX and 3RRR and 3D…) 

A war of wordss has broken out between Brisbane bovver boys Shandy and Pismo Beach-based Intercontinental Tag Team Champions the Psychotic Turnbuckles and it isn't pretty. 

The Turnbuckles make one of their sporadic visits to Australia in July as part of their preparations for an October onslaught on Japan, with gigs at La La La's in Wollongong (July 28) and Marrickville Bowling Club in Sydney (July 29.) Tickets for the respective shows are here and here.

Shandy are undertaking an East Coast tour and will be sharing the undercard at both shows with high-energy Wollongong outfit The Dark Clouds. 

Psychotic Turnbuckles vocalist Jesse The Intruder started the ball rolling with his motivational video about teamwork:

They emerged from the fog of COVID a year ago to give the pandemic the middle finger, riding a container ship to Australia all the way from Pismo Beach. 

The Psychotic Turnbuckles have again been coaxed out of semi-retirement in their palatial beachside mansions on the California coast to Destroy Dull Sydney one more time. Tickets are on sale here.

Make being at Marrickvile Bowling Club on Saturday, February 26 your New Year’s Resolution to see The Undisputed Champions of Rock and Roll bring the thunder.

Jessie the Intruder, The Grand Wizard, The Psychedelic Unknown, Count Forza and Gorgeous Karl Domah will be laying waste to two pretenders to the throne in Melbourne’s The Vibrajets and The Dark Clouds.

Comprised of past and present members of The Stems, The Shimmys, and The Breadmakers, The Vibrajets aren't the garage band the pedigree might suggest.

This is wigged out and twangin' surf and frat and rock'n'roll that goes back to the source – and is best enjoyed while shakin’ your moneymaker on the dance floor!

Pismo Beach's Kings of the Ring, the Psychotic Turnbuckles, kick off their anniversary "40 Years Undefeated" tour of  Australia's East Coast at The Tote Hotel in Melobourne this Saturday. Supports are crazy great Sydney glam rockers Starcrazy and hometown retro champions The Vibratones.  

Asked how the Turnbuckles would fare with no competitive matches under their collective belts since last October's triumphant Japan tour, frontman Jesse The Intrudertold us: "Champions never fold. We've been training hard in the Pismo Clam Club gym and amping up on Turnbuckle Tonic. We will wipe the floor with those pathetic support bands". 

Man of few words and drummer Buddy "Bam Bam" Balam The Brooklyn Bruiser added: "They are bums. So are you. Get out of my way."

Tickets for The Tote, Sydney (July 13) and Brisbane (September 7) shows are here, and are presneted by The I-94 Bar (Melbourne and Sydney) and Punkfest (Brisbane).

The pain will be real when the Psychotic Turnbuckles emerge from their palatial luxury homes in Pismo Beach and go on a two-city rampage in New South Wales in July.

The Turnbuckles play La La La’s in Wollongong on Friday, July 28 and Marrickville Bowling Club on Saturday, July 29 as preparation for a Japanese tour in October.

Lame-brain failed gym flunkies, The Dark Clouds, and limp-limbed Brisbane bovver boy pretenders, Shandy, are making up the numbers on both bills .

Prepare to see them out-classed in two no-holds barred elimination bouts, courtesy of the Turnbuckles, who are rightly hailed around the Intercontinental Rock and Roll Team Champions (undefeated).

“We’re heading to Japan to ‘say no to sumo’ but first we’ll practice our moves on The Dark Clouds and Shandy,” said Turnbuckles manager Chester Chitworth.

“We visited Australia for a training camp in a remote rural location earlier in the year and worked in our new bass man, The Infliktor, but this time is the real deal.

“We’re a hot commodity in demand around the world so who knows when your sad little country will see us again? I’m outta here – we’re going surfing.”

The shows are I-94 Bar promotions. Tickets for both are on sale via Moshtix (Wollongong) and Oztix(Marrickville.)

The I-94 Bar's favourite World Tag Team Champions, Psychotic Turnbuckles, wind up their "40 Years Undefeated Tour" with a Punkfest-promoted show at Black Bear Lodge in Brisbane on Saturday. Supports are The Dangermen, KillPIlland The Busymen and it's an early show with doors at 6.30pm. Tickets are here. 

But there's more! Turnbuckles frontman Jesse The Intruder and whichever other band members can be pried out of the fleshpots of Fortttude Valley will be Judy Jeston's special guests on her Subterranea show on 4ZZZ from 4.30pm AEST on Friday and you can stream it here.

Back in the 1980s, Sydney indie label Vi-Nil Records released the likes of singles by Hard-Ons, Lipstick Killers, Psychotic Turnbuckles, Labradogs, Conspirators, The Klerks and more. Forty years on, a new compilation album "Indie Sounds From The Harbour City (1983-1987)" showcases the cross section of bands on the label, and has been pressed on 14-track splatter vinyl and a 20-track, digipak CD.

To celebrate the album and the re-launch of the label, a series of kickarse live shows are locked in for late July. The first album launch is at Marrickville Bowling Club in Sydney on Friday, July 22, featuring the seasoned power pop of The Labradogs, the garage/punk/psych sounds of newly signed teensters Shacked, the stripped back intimate airs of Peter Black (aka Blackie from Hard-Ons) the Detroit garage energy of The Conspirators (playing a very rare show). 

Tickets go on sale hereon Tuesday. 

Lion Island, Labradogs, Shacked and Blackie will play a second launch at Link and Pin Cafe in Woy Woy onj July 23 and the4 Hamilton Station Hotel will host a Newcstle launch on July 24 with Disgraceland, Shacked and Labradogs. Pre-sales for the album are open here.

Indie Sounds From The Harbour City (1983-87) – Various Artists (Vi-Nil Records)

The Vi-Nil label lurched into life in 1983 with The Klerksand spawned more notable offspring such as the Hard-Ons and the Psychotic Turnbuckles before winding down at the end of the decade. This collection marks the label’s re-birth, and features a representative selection of its first era stable.

There are 20 tracks and it’s a diverse output, ranging from power-pop to acid punk and back to new wave and garage rock. Vi-Nil’s release of “Sockman” by the Lipstick Killers was my introduction to the label and to these ears it still epitomises the frenzied attack of the first era line-up.